VIDEO IS OUT...

GUYS IT'S OUT THERE

THE VIDEO IS OUT.

IT'S SHORT.

IT'S SMALL.

I SURE WISH I WAS MORE CREATIVE.

BUT HEY,

I'M WORKING ON IT.

GO LOOK:

mashafaye.blogspot.com

EIGHTEEN...

GUYS!! so was my birthday a few days ago!!!

Plus I made a new blog that I've been dreaming to open for a while..

more like change.. it's not all the way finished, but I'm going to include 

more photography, and inspiration in there..

please go look and check out my first post + pictures (maybe even a video *shocker*) about my birthday!

 

come join me:)

click the link!

mashafaye.blogspot.com

I WANT LOVE

aren't these two just so cute?

i love being able to capture such moments..

These past few weeks, maybe even months, I started thinking about love.

What is love?

I love the people around me, my family,

but is that how it will feel when you fall in love with the one?

I don't even know how I love. I mean, I don't know the feeling of loving my family, 

I just do. I just really do love them.

But is that it?

Alright then,

how will I know when I start loving him?

How will I know he loves me?

...

and

...

will he really?

because, you see, 

i want to love and be loved..

GOODBYE 16 // HELLO 17

As of November 1, I am officially 17. 

I can't even believe it myself. How? How did everything fly by so fast? I'm still living. I'm still breathing. And..

Oh! How I want to return to those past days and relive my life to this moment! To fix all those stupid mistakes I've made, treasure the "right now" moments more, and fully understand that life, keeps going; no matter what. I'd get to 17 even without that desire to be there. I wish I'd known better. 

But if there would only be one thing I've learned from all those years, it's this: you CAN'T go back. The past is the past. 

As of November 1, I am officially 17.

I can't even believe it myself. How? How did everything fly by so fast? I'm still living. I'm still breathing. And..

it's beautiful.

Please excuse my childish face. I am still not allowed to try free food samples when I don't have my parents close by. *disappointed head shaking*

psst.. pssstt.. guys..
i have a couple more ideas for posts coming soon..
including school, life, fears, and lessons..
stay tuned?

TIME MACHINE?! // NOMINATION #2

  I've never yet tried to align the text to the left on the this blog yet, so why not try it now? I'm feeling like doing something different no matter how small and insignificant it is right now.. hashtag rebel.

Just kidding ☺

Oh, stars and earth particles! I just learned how to make these keyboard emoji's!!! ☺♥☻

See.. you learn something new everyday when you choose to go the other way. *intelligent and inspiring life motivation right here*

-//-

  You might have noticed me gone from the blogger world. I, have been working on a teleporting machine and it somehow magically transported me to the wonderful state of Washington. #iwish No, but really, I've been in Washington for almost a week and a half and when I came home, we had to get ready for our church camp. I was, as a matter of fact, writing a post the day we were leaving to Washington but I had drop it because.. we were.. leaving. So I sorta have a valid excuse. Sorta.

It was fun. It was great. It was okay. I liked it. 

  No, but seriously, it was great. It all happened quite unexpectedly in the way that I had no clue whether I was going to Washington for sure till almost the last minuet. I was pretty excited to go adventuring and do something somewhere else. There wasn't really any adventuring, but I like to think there was. From this trip, I have gained many lessons in and about life and made several mental notes about changing myself. I should write them down so I wouldn't forget + they might also make a very interesting future post.. hmmmm. 

love you a Washingtooooooon..
Did I just make a pun?!?! NO WaYYY...
#nopunintended #butimlovingit

  I took this trip with my sister and her family and right before we left, I became sick to my stomach. Literally. For some reason, I started to have stomach pains. Maybe it the bacon I ate that morning, or maybe it was that I was so nervous. Because, you know, what if something happens to you or your family and then you'll never see them again or something? I prefer to die with my family around me, to be honest. But anyway, we had quite the time driving 27? 28? hours all the there. By the way, anyone living in Montana is SO lucky! The nature is just beautiful over there. If I get a travel buddy in the future, I'd definitely go exploring there a.s.a.p. I really enjoyed the time there spent camping in Idaho, swimming in amazingly clear lakes, waking up to bonfires, meeting new friends, selling firewood to fellow campers, and just joyfully living life. The only thing I'm quite sorry about was the fact that we only spent half a Sunday afternoon is the little tiny town of Walla Walla. It's just a small town but it has it's own lovely and unique tone about it. I know quite a few people there and hoped to hang out with them but fate and everything else was against us. *sad smiley face* But I promise to come back..

calm and collected.. 

 hah, NO.

more like

☻

-

I said I would return with another tagged nomination.. here it goes..

Annd.. I can't do it. The last week, something really uncomfortable happened so that I had to change my email. It's no longer lifeasmariya@gmail.com but nameisayiram@gmail.com. I'm pretty mad myself so please don't judge me. I'm just completely mad at the whole situation as well. Anyway, long story short, because I changed my email, I had to change my blogger admin or something similar and now all the people I followed before on blogger have disappeared and I can't follow anyone now? WHATT??? If anybody has a clue to what might be going on, I beg you, please help me!

EEP

Ughh.. I really don't even know where to begin. The end of last week and the start of this week had a pretty rocky time. Been bouncing from nervousness to excitement, from happy to sad, from sick to better and now back to sick, I think. Eh, this is life, so might as well go with the flow.

Anywho, the nervous part came from my piano recital which was on Friday. It wasn't my favorite one.. 'nuff said. And on Saturday morning, we had spring cleaning in our church. Then in the evening we were at my cousin's house. And that's kinda were it started. All I ate was a salad, and after that, I felt like continuously puking at everything. And everything, everything, I looked at made me feel nauseous. It was so not fun. Thankfully, after two pills of enzymes (which help with digestion and stuff like that), Sunday morning was so much better. I even formulated this theory that I hope will help me in the future. Imagine this: you have a lot of food on your plate, right? Salads, and meat, and everything like that. Each of them is delicious. But throw all that into the blender. How does it make you feel? Not that good, right? Would you eat your blend of meats and salads? Probably not. At least not with a hearty appetite. THIS is what happens in your STOMACH. Help it a little, why don't you?       I totally understand that that's pretty much exactly what the stomach is supposed to do, but be considerate and put at least a little less in there. Basically this is for me to keep in mind since I have a lot of problems with my stomach lately. But if it helps you, great!

*mini rant* if you haven't noticed

After church, some of our youth, my brothers and I decided to go, on what I call, an adventure! Basically, visiting the Sculpture Garden in Minneapolis. I have never ever been there, only heard about it and seen pictures, but my brothers have been there tons. But they were being sweet and went for me:) aww! It was great, it really was! I saw the whole cherry and spoon thing and then we walked through this place where there were other sculptures and took bunch of pictures. Then we crossed this bridge with cars whizzing past underneath. I stood came up to the edge and waved down. And people actually waved back and honked at me, can you believe that?!? That was seriously one of the best feelings ever!!!!! I really love being friendly to random strangers, and when they're friendly back at you... breathless! Pure JOY. The whole experience was phenomenal. We then walked a little farther, as soon as we got off the bridge, around a circle - I even saw a BLACK squirrel, WHAAA?? - and then back to our cars. But it was just, WOW. I even have a couple pictures to show you..:)

something like a mini walk-through botanical garden  

succulents.. 'nuff said

#cherrypickin

this was probably my favorite one

After all this, we were really hungry. Reaaally hungry. One of the guys offered to go to this restaurant called Holy Land. It's basically a mix of Middle Eastern cuisines. SO SO very good. Mmm mm mmm....

Anyway! Thanks guys for reading all this... if you did *eyebrows raised*.. sorry for the mini rant but hopefully all things will end well... 

Just noticed some more of you left a couple comments on my other posts.. gtg check em out!! :P

POEM // DAY 8

What if I read to you a story,

Starting; "Once Upon A Time",

And you realised that it was your life,

Spelt out on every line,

Would you hear my voice with wonder,

As it brushed across each word,

And pray my arms had strength to hold,

The truth about your world,

Would your view on life be different,

And would it shock you most to find,

That the things you thought defined you,

Could be summed up in just two lines,

And all the ones you took for granted,

The ins and outs of every day,

Play a bigger part in who you are,

Than you'd ever dared to say,

Would you wonder at the pages left,

And all the places that they'll lead,

Then vow to make each moment,

One that you'd be proud to read,

Because there is a story of your life,

But it's you that holds the pen,

And I hope you fill the pages right,

Before you reach the end.

~ e.h.

- 

Day 8:

Things that make you sad? 

Books and real life situations where a person is treated cruelly and with injustice //  sometimes how the judicial system is built, in fact, the WHOLE system and it makes me more mad than sad // when older people in restaurants sit by themselves - heartbreaking // bare trees in the fall // knowing the way to help a person but unable to do or say anything until they understand the situation themselves // thinking about all the time I've have wasted in my life // when I realize that how much of my life I've used up wishing for something that turned not even half as great // songs like "You Can Let Go Now, Daddy" - *where's the tissue?!* // ...I had such a good one just now but it slipped out from right under me.. ugh! I'll put it in as soon as possible..

By the way, IF ANYONE WANTS TO DO ANY INTERVIEWS, I'M MORE THAN WILLING! 

If you want to guest post here, go ahead and let me know. I'd LOVE that:) 

I'm bad with guest posting myself but interviews shouldn't be a problem (+ exchangeable ones).

What's one thing that makes you sad?

GARAGE SALE FINDS // DAY 7

I really really like garage sales. Especially the ones where there's a lot of good stuff for every good prices. And on Saturday my mum, my niece and I went on quite a few. Not all of them were the best ones but we did get some stuff. Here's my favorite:

little girl's dress - Cherokee - $1.00
The Trumpet of the Swan - $.50
Anne of Green Gables (complete and unabridged!!) - $.50 

Since Saturday was the last day of the garage sale, the owner had everything priced for a dollar. The dress was a definite buy - I love getting my nieces and nephews good stuff and the quality and cleanliness was great. And the books I've been wanting for a while. I'd rather have the books hard cover, but these would be great for underlining quotes and such. Although originally priced for a dollar each, I decided to take the risk of injuring my pride and bargained the books both for a dollar. Thankfully, the owner was more than willing. Whooh! I usually hate doing stuff like that, but when it comes to books.. I'm willing!

Garage sales are finally starting to pop up more now because of the warm weather and I cannot wait to find more interesting things! I remember how I used to hate them, and I could never understand people who loved them. But, honestly, thanks to books, I'm a changed person:) haha

- 

Day 7:

A show or a movie that has changed you and how?

This is like so not my favorite question because I really don't watch movies. Ah, so I can't answer this very well. But Schindler's List was quite a deeply emotional movie, although I don't really remember because I was around five or seven when we watched that. The Boy in Striped Pajamas was very sad too, as well as Anne Frank (and here I say I don't watch many movies, pshh). But I can't say any of them have changed me. I know for sure that some movies - both documentary and movies movies -  have, in some ways, changed my opinion on certain matters, but I can't think of any. I guess they weren't that special. Just kidding. :P


What are some movies that changed you?
Comment and let me know, I'm pretty curious:) 

THE LAST COUPLE OF DAYS

I have absolutely no words to describe last week. No words.

Excitement, adventure, lots of bringing-me-out-of-my-bubble and making new friends, tons of walking and too little sleep, hunger and can't-eat-anymore's, laughs, butterflies-in-my-stomach's, and seeing some people for a first time since being wee kids.
And all this doesn't even explain absolutely anything.

As you know, four out of the twelve people came Wednesday evening.
And on Thursday we went to downtown Minneapolis. Oh yes. That was lovely.

a random garage. i mean, how cool and wacky is this?

It was fun but I hardly talked to anyone except my brothers (severe case of shyness and nervousness; which, let me tell you, had improved slightly over the next couple of days *self pat on the back right there*). But what a glorious time we had, walking through the downtown and seeing all those people you never get to see at home!
* The next day, Friday the twenty-fourth, was the first day of Congress. It started at 10 a.m. and ended at 10 p.m. And that was a bit of a problem since it was that way for the whole three days. I mean, that's great and all it's just that when you go to sleep at three in morning and wake up at seven, that slightly runs your energy down. And I didn't have a choice since I was the one on the couch in the living room. But, hey! that was actually pretty fun.
* Basically the same thing happened on Saturday. Some of the sermons were very good and had a deep effect on the soul and spirit; I'm very thankful for that. It was pretty hard to concentrate sometimes though because of the late and few hours of sleep. I meet some of my friends I haven't seen in a while and actually talked to those who I knew but was very shy to come up before. Those were mostly the people who pushed me out of my bubble and forced me to communicate with others :P
* Sunday was the last day. I feel like crying even right now. We had our service in a convention center and around five thousand people were present. Imagine how hard I had to cling to my brothers so I wouldn't get cut off and left behind with no phone and no clue where to go! It was that bad. But afterwards, we went back to our old church where a huge lunch/dinner for the people was prepared. There I made some more friends from Canada. *happy dance* One of the girls that I've met was soo sweet it just surprised me. I was almost speechless when talking to her. She listened so carefully to whatever I was saying that it made me feel like I was saying something utmost important. Like, how can she even do that? I've seen her before at the conference walking by, and I always imagined her being someone who looks down on other random people. But how wrong I was! I always thought I was a good judge of people. Yeah.. about that...*rubbing the back of my neck*
Anyway, we had a bonfire with a lot of the people we met at our house. My sister-in-law's family were also there. She has a brother my age that I haven't talked to since their wedding. I've seen him before and even at the congress but didn't come up to him because I didn't want to embarrass myself. Well, like imagine if I did come up to him randomly, "Hey! Do you remember me? Well of course you do, how could you not? How's life treating you?"  Yeah.. NO.
So when we came home, I was really nervous about meeting and talking to him and didn't come outside (where he was) for awhile. But courage prevailed - I'm surprised at where that came from, but then again, I couldn't hide forever - and I went out on the deck. Most of my nephews and nieces were there as well so I was like, "Hey, hey!" It was more like, "Hey, heyyy." lol
And the moment they see me, they start yelling my name and clamoring up the deck to hug and kiss me. See what an amazing aunt I am? That is SUCH a good way to introduce yourself. Like, "Hey! My name is Mariya and, oh, excuse these little cute munchkins of mine. They haven't seen me for awhile and obviously as you can see, I'm their favorite aunt." Mmmhmmm. First impression people, first impression. To tell you honestly, I've always wanted them to do that in front of somebody.. shhhh..  I came down and then we meet. And then we went to a store to get all the s'mores ingredients with his friend who is now also my friend. And then we came back. And then we made s'mores. And sang Christian songs by the bonfire with everybody with the sound of a guitar accompanying us.

And this is how the weekend of Congress came to an end.

Oh, I forgot the part where the neighbors clapped in appreciation after we finished one of the songs.

This is how beautiful life can be. If you take out all the stress of the weekend.

-

This post should have been up on the blog a long time ago. Please forgive me for still living in the past. LOVE YOU ALL<3

SUNDAY OUTFIT // DAY 5

I love Sundays. I can go to church, fill my head and heart with the Word of God to think over the week.

Our church is very small, about around 60 people, but I love it very much. That's the good thing about a small church. You get to know everybody. And you get to know them know than just a-face-you-see-every-Sunday.

Well, I've seen some OOTD's (outfit of the day) around other blogs and decided to try it. I'm not a big fan of taking pictures of myself or having others do it - because I only have brothers or my parents to do it and, believe me, that gets awkward - so I just took a picture of the clothes. I'm also not a huge fashion enthusiast, well maybe, but I like dressing up every once in a while so I hope you enjoy this:)

OUTFIT DETAILS:

shirt - Sear's 
skirt - Target
knit cardigan - garage sale
watch - birthday present


The best thing about this whole outfit is the fact that none of these items cost a lot. Basically, nothing in my closet costs too much of a pretty penny. I've had a couple but they were either totally worth it or very much regretted.
The pencil skirt is probably one of my favorite buys as I've been looking for one that's modest and at the same time pretty cute; it was only around $7!!
The price for the shirt was $7 as well. Pricey, but it's just too cute.
My mother bought the cardigan at a garage sale for about $.25 or $.75. This is exactly why I love garage sales :)
The watch I got from my brother on my birthday - like two years ago? It's very slender and chic and I wear it whenever I go out.



If you like this OOTD post, please let me know so I can do more:)

-

Day 5:

Something you would change about the world?

A million things and probably everything. But, honestly, I don't care. I just really really want the Lord to come faster and take us all home. I'm tired living in a world full of sin and grief.

That is that.

SPRING // DAY 4

Hey guys! It's officially (in my world) SPRING! How fantastic is that? I am definitely ready for some warmer weather and thunderstorms and clean fresh air. Hope it stays this way for a looong time. 

I love how we have all these different fruit trees in our backyard. It makes spring time so special with all these different blossoms blooming at different times. We have apple trees, and pear trees, and cherry trees, and an apricot tree. Though I'm pretty sure I left something out. *cheesy grin*

Oh yeah, was it the banana tree? But it doesn't blossom. At least not yet. And probably not any time soon.

Our apricot blossoms..

Apple trees starting to bloom.

Apricot blossoms blooming.

-

Day 4:

How do you think you're life would change if you achieved your dream? 

Taking in consideration that my dream right now is to get my life in as much order as I can, I'd say my life would change pretty nicely. Imagine, schoolwork always on time, piano practices every day, and knowledge expanding. Basically an almost perfect life. And no, I do not wish for a perfect life. I wish for a fulfilling life. A fulfilling life for my Savior. 

Better go work on that, huh?

QOTD (question of the day): What is the best compliment you have ever received?

FORREST ADVENTURES // DAY 3

My brother (I'll call him P so not to mix you all up with the other five I have) and I went on a forest adventure yesterday. The word adventure might be slightly exaggerating; it was mostly all about taking pictures in a forest environment. But the butterfly feeling of an adventure was still there in my stomach. 

P used to be a photographer by profession. Now, it's a hobby whenever there's time, I guess. But it's a total inspiration being there with him and hearing him describe how to look for something fascinating in a seemingly boring place. Photography is truly such a beautiful thing to ever happen. And anyone can use it and do it. The forest might seem nothing special; the same silvery brown bland hues everywhere with a few little green plants peeking out every now and then to give at least a slight pop of color. But here's where you and the camera come in.

You are the main and most important factor here. It's all about how you see your surrounding. And the camera helps you accomplish that. It's a tool you use to give more detail to what you see and how you see it and what you want to focus on. I honestly have no words right now as how to describe photography. Maybe one day, when I'll finally understand the world, I'll tell you how it's done.

Now, the adventurous side. The forest was pretty scary. I now can honestly say that I do understand how people get lost in forest. Like seriously 100% understand. The fact that everything, everything, is the same color, I think that alone is enough for you to go berserk! After a while, it seems as if all the trees are the same and everything is the same and how do you get out of here?!? Seriously.

The other creepy thing was that after a little way into the forest, we happened upon a mattress. An old, mossy, little mattress. How. Disturbing. Is. That?!?! Farther in, there were more old, rotten, dirty and mossy and completely decayed wooden and wired bed stuff. The whole scene was pretty intensely eerie. But pretty fun nonetheless.

me crawling through the forest

beautiful flowers

eerie ruins left in the forest

-


Day 3:
What do you think is your reason for being here?


This was and is a pretty difficult question to answer. From a worldly point of view, I'd maybe say something similar to being here for my family, accomplishing something in this world whether for humanity or myself, or maybe just surviving. But I clearly disagree with that. I truly think there's something more to me and everyone else being here. I decided to ask my father.
My father is a big role model for me, both in his actions and words. He is someone I greatly admire especially in his spiritual knowledge. When I came up to him with this question, I wasn't exactly sure how to put it in such a way that I could explain what exactly I was looking for in an answer. But I think I got what I came for.
God created us. He created us so He can love us and we can love Him in return. I asked, "Why? What's the point in that if people still reject Him?" Well, what's the point in having children, then? Why does a mother want a child so? To want to love and cherish and to be loved and cherished in return. It seems so complicated but so simple. And now, at least I, understand my reason for being here.

(I really need to learn how to write better, don't I?)



What do you think is your reason for being here?

SAYING GOODBYE // DAY 2

A little episode of our lives came to a closure.

Today my brother and I had probably our last IHOP breakfast. Remembering it makes me so sad. We made friends with the waiters and almost never had to look into the menu. We always ordered extra extra extra whipped cream, and they always made sure we had extra extra extra whipped cream. They asked us little questions about our lives and we, in turn, asked about theirs. I wonder what they will think happened to us if we don't come anymore. For the possibilities are endless of what could have happened to us. Or will they forget about us?  

I genuinely hope they have the best in their lives.

"There's always a reason for meeting the people we met." 

-

Day 2:

Something illegal that you consider should be legal.

The right to own chickens and such on your property without having to ask the consent of your city. Like come' on. We had chickens once but were ordered by the city to remove them. Well, I think that was more because of a neighbor's complaint (the chickens didn't even make that much noise). But still our city won't let you own chickens unless you have so much land. I get upset just by remembering about all this. The chickens were the cutest things ever!