Friday, November 6, 2015


As of November 1, I am officially 17. 
I can't even believe it myself. How? How did everything fly by so fast? I'm still living. I'm still breathing. And..
Oh! How I want to return to those past days and relive my life to this moment! To fix all those stupid mistakes I've made, treasure the "right now" moments more, and fully understand that life, keeps going; no matter what. I'd get to 17 even without that desire to be there. I wish I'd known better. 
But if there would only be one thing I've learned from all those years, it's this: you CAN'T go back. The past is the past. 

As of November 1, I am officially 17.
I can't even believe it myself. How? How did everything fly by so fast? I'm still living. I'm still breathing. And..
it's beautiful.

Please excuse my childish face. I am still not allowed to try free food samples when I don't have my parents close by. *disappointed head shaking*

psst.. pssstt.. guys..
i have a couple more ideas for posts coming soon..
including school, life, fears, and lessons..
stay tuned?

Friday, August 28, 2015


i hate the fact that we can never be secure about our safety.
i hate the fact that i'm insecure about myself.
i sometimes hate the fact that i'm not like other girls.
i hate the fact that i can't feel comfortable not being in a skirt.
i hate the fact that i'm almost never comfortable around people..
even my own family
i hate the fact that i always feel like i made a mistake
and whenever people start laughing, i always wonder if i'm the one they're laughing at.
i hate pretending everything is good when everything is not
and i hate feeling bad when others have it worse.
i hate the fact that i complain.
i hate the fact that i back down on my promises.
i hate that i can't help but keep falling down
and sometimes, not even trying or wanting to get back up.
i hate the fact that even mild jokes about me or my weight hurt me.
i wish they didn't. it's not like i should care, right?
i hate the fact that i feel fat
and the fact that i don't do anything to feel better.
i hate the fact that everyone's too busy or tired to do something..
and that i'm like that too.
i hate the fact that i don't learn from my mistakes.
i hate the fact that i'm too trusting.
i hate the fact that i waste my time doing nothing when i could've done so much.
i hate the fact that i don't have any true friends.
i hate the fact that even though frankness is the way too go,
no one wants to hear it and neither do i.
i hate the fact that i get irritated when shown my faults.
i hate the fact that i'm lazy.
i hate the fact that there are more of these facts that I hate..

and i hate the fact that even though i hate all these facts

i don't do anything to change them.

Tuesday, July 28, 2015



this is getting completely messed up..
even the photos from my old posts won't show up.
I guess it all sinks down to the point that I changed admins, but still this is very sad and frustrating. I'm very disappointed. Oh 🐳..

Well, on a lighter note, I made a new page THE BUCKET which is basically a bucket list of sorts. I have only one up there right now because I forgot most of them already, but that would be totally sweet if you left a couple of YOUR ideas for a bucketlist ☺

Also, if you have any ideas for topics you would like to see on here or anything similar,
please don't hesitate to comment because honestly that really makes my day and stuff:)


please bear with me while I set up all this inconveniences☻

btw, follow me: 
IG: nameisayiram
twenty20: mazik

Tuesday, July 21, 2015


  I've never yet tried to align the text to the left on the this blog yet, so why not try it now? I'm feeling like doing something different no matter how small and insignificant it is right now.. hashtag rebel.

Just kidding ☺

Oh, stars and earth particles! I just learned how to make these keyboard emoji's!!! ☺♥☻

See.. you learn something new everyday when you choose to go the other way. *intelligent and inspiring life motivation right here*

  You might have noticed me gone from the blogger world. I, have been working on a teleporting machine and it somehow magically transported me to the wonderful state of Washington. #iwish No, but really, I've been in Washington for almost a week and a half and when I came home, we had to get ready for our church camp. I was, as a matter of fact, writing a post the day we were leaving to Washington but I had drop it because.. we were.. leaving. So I sorta have a valid excuse. Sorta.

It was fun. It was great. It was okay. I liked it. 

  No, but seriously, it was great. It all happened quite unexpectedly in the way that I had no clue whether I was going to Washington for sure till almost the last minuet. I was pretty excited to go adventuring and do something somewhere else. There wasn't really any adventuring, but I like to think there was. From this trip, I have gained many lessons in and about life and made several mental notes about changing myself. I should write them down so I wouldn't forget + they might also make a very interesting future post.. hmmmm. 

love you a Washingtooooooon..
Did I just make a pun?!?! NO WaYYY...
#nopunintended #butimlovingit

  I took this trip with my sister and her family and right before we left, I became sick to my stomach. Literally. For some reason, I started to have stomach pains. Maybe it the bacon I ate that morning, or maybe it was that I was so nervous. Because, you know, what if something happens to you or your family and then you'll never see them again or something? I prefer to die with my family around me, to be honest. But anyway, we had quite the time driving 27? 28? hours all the there. By the way, anyone living in Montana is SO lucky! The nature is just beautiful over there. If I get a travel buddy in the future, I'd definitely go exploring there a.s.a.p. I really enjoyed the time there spent camping in Idaho, swimming in amazingly clear lakes, waking up to bonfires, meeting new friends, selling firewood to fellow campers, and just joyfully living life. The only thing I'm quite sorry about was the fact that we only spent half a Sunday afternoon is the little tiny town of Walla Walla. It's just a small town but it has it's own lovely and unique tone about it. I know quite a few people there and hoped to hang out with them but fate and everything else was against us. *sad smiley face* But I promise to come back..
calm and collected.. 
 hah, NO.
more like


I said I would return with another tagged nomination.. here it goes..

Annd.. I can't do it. The last week, something really uncomfortable happened so that I had to change my email. It's no longer but I'm pretty mad myself so please don't judge me. I'm just completely mad at the whole situation as well. Anyway, long story short, because I changed my email, I had to change my blogger admin or something similar and now all the people I followed before on blogger have disappeared and I can't follow anyone now? WHATT??? If anybody has a clue to what might be going on, I beg you, please help me!

Monday, June 22, 2015


I have returned. It took awhile, I know, and I wish I had some pretty excusable excuses; unfortunately, there aren't that many. But we won't dwell on the past..

Yup. His face speaks of true pain. I cannot stop watching it over and over. 

My laptop came back - still with no name - and I did, I promise you I did, have many really interesting topics and subjects on which I wanted to write about. And then I forgot one of the key rule thingy I wanted to point out on the most important subject. The whole many weeks before, I kept walking around imaging my "article" thing and how to write it and beautify it - alert, alert, key word here - and all that jazz. And having it just slip out like that is really almost impolite.

*throwing the blame around like confetti here*

But really, it has been slightly crazy here. I had to take an ACT test on the 13th. I need to make a 24 on it so I can get into college early, but I don't think that's happening. I'm lucky if it's 22. IF. As if. Yeah. And the kidos left awhile back with the birthing going all right, thankfully.

Right now I'm staying over at my sister's house. We planned to go swimming tomorrow on my niece's birthday, but the lady whose house we were supposed to go just gave birth. How great is that? But I also really wanted to go swimming. I haven't been swimming for three years now and I really miss it. I'm glad the little guy is finally here, though:)

What's been going with you guys lately?


I am seriously so happy that I made the decision of becoming a blogger. I was bored and I wanted to do something that none of my friends or family knew about. I wanted to do something different, something new. And I did it. And now I have friends and a family whose kindness and friendship I'll honestly never forget. I love you guys!

Now this really lovely person I call my blogger friend, Paige from Sunday Best and All the Rest, tagged me in the Sisterhood of the World Bloggers Award.

 Thank you so much Paige! It has been one of my dreams to be tagged in some type of an award! (I was also nominated in another award so that's coming soon!! Eeep!!)
Here it goes:


1. Thank the blogger who nominated you, linking back to their site. 

2. Put the Award logo on your blog. 

3. Answer the ten questions sent to you. 

4. Make up ten new questions for your nominees to answer. 

5. Nominate ten blogs.*

I'm afraid that I cannot nominate so many due to, just, things..?

 questions // answers:

1. Have you ever been in a choir or other singing group? I actually have and still do. When I was a little kid in my old church I used to go to the kid's choir.. good memories. And in my new church I used to sing with four other girls my age. Now I sometimes sing with the youth choir. 

2. Do you have any strange or unusual talents (e.g. wiggling ears, yodeling)? Not to my knowledge. Now I'm asking everyone I know if I have any XD I'm learning to raise my left eyebrow.. does that count as a talent?? But my niece can lick her elbow..

3. Do you find wombats cute and cuddly? YES!!! I want one nowwww!!!!!!!!! Someone buy me a wombat please.........
how can you not find them all cute and cuddly..?

4. What was the last song you heard? I don't even remember what I ate for breakfast... usually..

5. What were you very happy to accomplish last year? Uhhh... I don't... know??

6. What do you hope to accomplish this year? To get into college; learn a lot of piano techniques; get into better physical shape; improve my photography skills; and just improve myself and who I am.
7. Given the choice, would you rather have someone over for dinner tomorrow or go to someone else's house for dinner? It really depends but I'd go with dinner at someone's house. But only if they cook very good.. (or is it well?)

8.  If you could be a pen-pal or e-pal with someone from any nation, what country would you choose (it can't be a country in which you already have a friend)? Russia for sure, but I also would love Australia or Austria!! 

9. What is one thing you disliked doing as a child and now enjoy doing as a teen or adult? Definitely sleeping, and eating vegetables - yuuumm, and sometimes being left alone. I also love getting clothes as gifts; I remember hating that.. 

10. Has blogging changed you as a person? If so, how? Can't really say it has changed me, but I love feeling and knowing that someone somewhere reads my stuff and appreciates it(?). Love the little fluttery thingy when someone hopes you feel better or just really anything.. it's like you really mean something. Doesn't matter what prompted them to write, it's that they actually took the time to write.  

my questions:

1. If you were asked to speak to a graduating class, what would you say?
 2. What is your happiest childhood memory?  What makes it so special?
3. Would you rather visit a lush forest or a beautiful desert?
4. Have you ever been in a newspaper?
5. If you could breed two animals together to defy the laws of nature what new animal would you create?
6. If you could ask your future self one question what would it be?
7. Have you ever had a secret admirer?
8. What's the next thing you would like to learn or master. 
9. What historical figure would you love to see in 21st century life?
10. What do you love the most about blogging?

my nominees:

Phoebe at life with Phoebs
Olivia at summer of 1999

if you guys have already done this award then I guess feel free to do whatever you want, no pressure :)

p.s. I'll be doing another nomination soon, too:)
p.s.s. Thank you guys for EVERYTHING!! 

Tuesday, May 26, 2015


(that's a French hello for you there)
You basically know something good is about to happen when a person says 'hi' in a different language. *spoiler alert* But seriously, try noticing this.
I have a surprise for you guys!! It's an interview time with Olivia Williams from Life as a Young Lady! Over the last week we have sent out 15 questions for each other and then our answers. So, keep checking her blog for her interview questions with me.. tadadada!!!

Here it goes:

1. if you could change your name, would you? I wouldn't! My name fits me so well, and also it was handed down to me from my mom's side of the family, so I want to keep it.

2. what was/is a nickname you always wanted to be called? I was really always okay with just "Olivia" haha. But now my mom insists on calling me "La-La" (long story originating with my little brother), my extended family calls me "Livvy" (a common nickname that I guess I can't complain about), and my friend will not stop calling me "Olive Tree". Like??? I know my name literally means "olive tree" but does she have to call me that?

3. would you rather be invisible or have the ability to fly? Being invisible would allow me to take food without my parents noticing. Also I could sleep as long as I want without them knowing where I am. Since food and sleep are my top priorities, I'm going with invisibility.

4. what is something silly you've always wanted to do? I...have no idea haha. think it's silly that I want to make a successful studio film one day...but I don't know if that actually counts as something silly.

5. do you go more for style or comfort? Comfort for sure. I like looking good (just went shopping yesterday holla) but if the clothes aren't comfortable, then I don't want 'em.

5. what is your favorite quote? "Am I more than you bargained for yet?"--Fall Out Boy, Sugar We're Goin Down

6. would you rather go to a museum or a theater? Museums are nice, but depending on what's being displayed in the museum, I'd rather go to the movie theater (unless the museum is like a Marvel museum or something awesome like that) 

7. what is a quality you look for when you meet new people? A sense of humor like mine. Also music and TV/movie taste that is at least similar to mine.

8. would you like to have the life of a celebrity? NOOOO. I feel like once you become a celebrity, you sort of sell your soul to it--you don't have a life anymore; paparazzi follow you around; nothing is private; people basically treat you like you're not a human and don't deserve to have a normal life. I never, ever want to be a celebrity. Ever.

9. what are three things you really like about yourself? Ooooh...this one is hard. I guess that I'm not fake, I'm Christian. and that I don't like Twilight.

10. what is your favorite flower (other than a rose)? I don't know any flowers but the rose haha. I guess sunflowers.

11. what was the last serious question you've asked/needed an answer for? "Can I sleep over at Melody's house?" (If you don't think this question is serious then you don't know my parents.)

12. are you an introvert or an extrovert? Introvert for sure. I get literally physically exhausted by being around people for too long.

13. what's your favorite song? Currently I'm loving My Songs Know What You Did in the Dark by Fall Out Boy and Elastic Heart by Sia and the Weeknd.

14. what is one thing you regret in life? Wanting to grow up. I wanted to be older so badly when I was younger and now that I'm hearing about all the terrors of high school and college and taxes and other bleh stuff that comes with life, I just want to go back to being three years old.

15. what is something you want? To move to Georgia. I've been wanting to for like a year now. I really hope it happens.

excuse the double 5, I just noticed it right now.. :S
I made Olivia answer a question more.. Mwahaha!!! 

Soo.. it's so much fun getting to know people in the blogging community!! And it's totally sweet to get new friends that you probably would never have met otherwise!! Go and check her blog out too.

Hey, Olivia.. we have many similarities;))

Wednesday, May 20, 2015


Ughh.. I really don't even know where to begin. The end of last week and the start of this week had a pretty rocky time. Been bouncing from nervousness to excitement, from happy to sad, from sick to better and now back to sick, I think. Eh, this is life, so might as well go with the flow.

Anywho, the nervous part came from my piano recital which was on Friday. It wasn't my favorite one.. 'nuff said. And on Saturday morning, we had spring cleaning in our church. Then in the evening we were at my cousin's house. And that's kinda were it started. All I ate was a salad, and after that, I felt like continuously puking at everything. And everything, everything, I looked at made me feel nauseous. It was so not fun. Thankfully, after two pills of enzymes (which help with digestion and stuff like that), Sunday morning was so much better. I even formulated this theory that I hope will help me in the future. Imagine this: you have a lot of food on your plate, right? Salads, and meat, and everything like that. Each of them is delicious. But throw all that into the blender. How does it make you feel? Not that good, right? Would you eat your blend of meats and salads? Probably not. At least not with a hearty appetite. THIS is what happens in your STOMACH. Help it a little, why don't you?       I totally understand that that's pretty much exactly what the stomach is supposed to do, but be considerate and put at least a little less in there. Basically this is for me to keep in mind since I have a lot of problems with my stomach lately. But if it helps you, great!
*mini rant* if you haven't noticed

After church, some of our youth, my brothers and I decided to go, on what I call, an adventure! Basically, visiting the Sculpture Garden in Minneapolis. I have never ever been there, only heard about it and seen pictures, but my brothers have been there tons. But they were being sweet and went for me:) aww! It was great, it really was! I saw the whole cherry and spoon thing and then we walked through this place where there were other sculptures and took bunch of pictures. Then we crossed this bridge with cars whizzing past underneath. I stood came up to the edge and waved down. And people actually waved back and honked at me, can you believe that?!? That was seriously one of the best feelings ever!!!!! I really love being friendly to random strangers, and when they're friendly back at you... breathless! Pure JOY. The whole experience was phenomenal. We then walked a little farther, as soon as we got off the bridge, around a circle - I even saw a BLACK squirrel, WHAAA?? - and then back to our cars. But it was just, WOW. I even have a couple pictures to show you..:)

something like a mini walk-through botanical garden  

succulents.. 'nuff said


this was probably my favorite one
After all this, we were really hungry. Reaaally hungry. One of the guys offered to go to this restaurant called Holy Land. It's basically a mix of Middle Eastern cuisines. SO SO very good. Mmm mm mmm....

Anyway! Thanks guys for reading all this... if you did *eyebrows raised*.. sorry for the mini rant but hopefully all things will end well... 

Just noticed some more of you left a couple comments on my other posts.. gtg check em out!! :P

Tuesday, May 12, 2015


What if I read to you a story,
Starting; "Once Upon A Time",

And you realised that it was your life,
Spelt out on every line,
Would you hear my voice with wonder,
As it brushed across each word,
And pray my arms had strength to hold,
The truth about your world,
Would your view on life be different,
And would it shock you most to find,
That the things you thought defined you,
Could be summed up in just two lines,
And all the ones you took for granted,
The ins and outs of every day,
Play a bigger part in who you are,
Than you'd ever dared to say,
Would you wonder at the pages left,
And all the places that they'll lead,
Then vow to make each moment,
One that you'd be proud to read,
Because there is a story of your life,
But it's you that holds the pen,
And I hope you fill the pages right,
Before you reach the end.
~ e.h.

Day 8:
Things that make you sad? 
Books and real life situations where a person is treated cruelly and with injustice //  sometimes how the judicial system is built, in fact, the WHOLE system and it makes me more mad than sad // when older people in restaurants sit by themselves - heartbreaking // bare trees in the fall // knowing the way to help a person but unable to do or say anything until they understand the situation themselves // thinking about all the time I've have wasted in my life // when I realize that how much of my life I've used up wishing for something that turned not even half as great // songs like "You Can Let Go Now, Daddy" - *where's the tissue?!* // ...I had such a good one just now but it slipped out from right under me.. ugh! I'll put it in as soon as possible..

If you want to guest post here, go ahead and let me know. I'd LOVE that:) 
I'm bad with guest posting myself but interviews shouldn't be a problem (+ exchangeable ones).

What's one thing that makes you sad?

Monday, May 11, 2015


I really really like garage sales. Especially the ones where there's a lot of good stuff for every good prices. And on Saturday my mum, my niece and I went on quite a few. Not all of them were the best ones but we did get some stuff. Here's my favorite:

little girl's dress - Cherokee - $1.00
The Trumpet of the Swan - $.50
Anne of Green Gables (complete and unabridged!!) - $.50 

Since Saturday was the last day of the garage sale, the owner had everything priced for a dollar. The dress was a definite buy - I love getting my nieces and nephews good stuff and the quality and cleanliness was great. And the books I've been wanting for a while. I'd rather have the books hard cover, but these would be great for underlining quotes and such. Although originally priced for a dollar each, I decided to take the risk of injuring my pride and bargained the books both for a dollar. Thankfully, the owner was more than willing. Whooh! I usually hate doing stuff like that, but when it comes to books.. I'm willing!

Garage sales are finally starting to pop up more now because of the warm weather and I cannot wait to find more interesting things! I remember how I used to hate them, and I could never understand people who loved them. But, honestly, thanks to books, I'm a changed person:) haha

Day 7:

A show or a movie that has changed you and how?

This is like so not my favorite question because I really don't watch movies. Ah, so I can't answer this very well. But Schindler's List was quite a deeply emotional movie, although I don't really remember because I was around five or seven when we watched that. The Boy in Striped Pajamas was very sad too, as well as Anne Frank (and here I say I don't watch many movies, pshh). But I can't say any of them have changed me. I know for sure that some movies - both documentary and movies movies -  have, in some ways, changed my opinion on certain matters, but I can't think of any. I guess they weren't that special. Just kidding. :P

What are some movies that changed you?
Comment and let me know, I'm pretty curious:) 

Wednesday, May 6, 2015


I have absolutely no words to describe last week. No words.

Excitement, adventure, lots of bringing-me-out-of-my-bubble and making new friends, tons of walking and too little sleep, hunger and can't-eat-anymore's, laughs, butterflies-in-my-stomach's, and seeing some people for a first time since being wee kids.
And all this doesn't even explain absolutely anything.

As you know, four out of the twelve people came Wednesday evening.
And on Thursday we went to downtown Minneapolis. Oh yes. That was lovely.
a random garage. i mean, how cool and wacky is this?

It was fun but I hardly talked to anyone except my brothers (severe case of shyness and nervousness; which, let me tell you, had improved slightly over the next couple of days *self pat on the back right there*). But what a glorious time we had, walking through the downtown and seeing all those people you never get to see at home!
* The next day, Friday the twenty-fourth, was the first day of Congress. It started at 10 a.m. and ended at 10 p.m. And that was a bit of a problem since it was that way for the whole three days. I mean, that's great and all it's just that when you go to sleep at three in morning and wake up at seven, that slightly runs your energy down. And I didn't have a choice since I was the one on the couch in the living room. But, hey! that was actually pretty fun.
* Basically the same thing happened on Saturday. Some of the sermons were very good and had a deep effect on the soul and spirit; I'm very thankful for that. It was pretty hard to concentrate sometimes though because of the late and few hours of sleep. I meet some of my friends I haven't seen in a while and actually talked to those who I knew but was very shy to come up before. Those were mostly the people who pushed me out of my bubble and forced me to communicate with others :P
Sunday was the last day. I feel like crying even right now. We had our service in a convention center and around five thousand people were present. Imagine how hard I had to cling to my brothers so I wouldn't get cut off and left behind with no phone and no clue where to go! It was that bad. But afterwards, we went back to our old church where a huge lunch/dinner for the people was prepared. There I made some more friends from Canada. *happy dance* One of the girls that I've met was soo sweet it just surprised me. I was almost speechless when talking to her. She listened so carefully to whatever I was saying that it made me feel like I was saying something utmost important. Like, how can she even do that? I've seen her before at the conference walking by, and I always imagined her being someone who looks down on other random people. But how wrong I was! I always thought I was a good judge of people. Yeah.. about that...*rubbing the back of my neck*
Anyway, we had a bonfire with a lot of the people we met at our house. My sister-in-law's family were also there. She has a brother my age that I haven't talked to since their wedding. I've seen him before and even at the congress but didn't come up to him because I didn't want to embarrass myself. Well, like imagine if I did come up to him randomly, "Hey! Do you remember me? Well of course you do, how could you not? How's life treating you?"  Yeah.. NO.
So when we came home, I was really nervous about meeting and talking to him and didn't come outside (where he was) for awhile. But courage prevailed - I'm surprised at where that came from, but then again, I couldn't hide forever - and I went out on the deck. Most of my nephews and nieces were there as well so I was like, "Hey, hey!" It was more like, "Hey, heyyy." lol
And the moment they see me, they start yelling my name and clamoring up the deck to hug and kiss me. See what an amazing aunt I am? That is SUCH a good way to introduce yourself. Like, "Hey! My name is Mariya and, oh, excuse these little cute munchkins of mine. They haven't seen me for awhile and obviously as you can see, I'm their favorite aunt." Mmmhmmm. First impression people, first impression. To tell you honestly, I've always wanted them to do that in front of somebody.. shhhh..  I came down and then we meet. And then we went to a store to get all the s'mores ingredients with his friend who is now also my friend. And then we came back. And then we made s'mores. And sang Christian songs by the bonfire with everybody with the sound of a guitar accompanying us.

And this is how the weekend of Congress came to an end.

Oh, I forgot the part where the neighbors clapped in appreciation after we finished one of the songs.

This is how beautiful life can be. If you take out all the stress of the weekend.


This post should have been up on the blog a long time ago. Please forgive me for still living in the past. LOVE YOU ALL<3

Wednesday, April 22, 2015


Oh my goodness. PEOPLE. 



The thing is, we're having tons of people staying over at our house for the next couple days. And when I say tons, I mean, tons. Not only coming over, but sleeping over. And I'm not sure if I'm supposed even stay in my room. MY OWN ROOM. Either that or, I share. But c'mon. Who shares beds these days. Who even shares at all these days. Like seriously. 

If you haven't noticed yet, I have problems with hospitality. I mean, sure! come over and let's drink tea and stay up till 3 in the morning and have ocean deep conversations. Let's! But DO NOT make me share my bed or, even worse, move me from my own room. It's actually called 'my room' for a purpose you know. 
But, on the bright side, we're actually having people over. Should be fun, ya'know? Ohh.. I didn't even mention why we're having people over. That's because there's going to be this congress of like so many churches combined and they're all coming here, to my home state. Yup. This is where the congress will take place. Annnd, I might actually even go to the congress because of my two amazing brothers. At first I thought I won't since there might not be enough room, but I asked my brother today and he said (whispered), "YASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS." So I guess that's a yes?! I mean, I'll take that!

But I'm so nervous!!! I might have to talk to people and I not very good at that stuff!! Especially the guys. OH. MY. GOODNESS. The GUYS. 
I'm more of the you-talk-to-me-I-might-talk-to-you type of gal. Seriously. I won't chatter my head off unless I'm like SUPER comfortable with you or I have no choice but to talk to you. Yeah. 

Them nerves.


Day 6:
What's something you would change about yourself?

A LOT of stuff.

But most importantly, all lot of my bad habits that I've formed and that have grown quite some roots over the years. Yeah, those. I wish that I would've been very careful watching my actions and thoughts. I know that there still is a way to dig them out and I'm still trying, but now that will take so much more work than it could have. 

I know that I'm not quite answering the questions directly; I have to say that I try. I do. It's just that when I'm thinking about how and what to answer, the answers just slip out of my mind. When I see the question for the day, I'm like, "Pshh, easy as PIE." But then I start trying to answer. Yeah, right, easy as PIE.  

Yeah right. 

QOTD: what's your favorite color?
AOTD: mine's green, as of right now. all shades of green.  

By the way, do ya'll want any OOTD of the outfits I'll wear for the three day congress?

Monday, April 20, 2015


I love Sundays. I can go to church, fill my head and heart with the Word of God to think over the week.

Our church is very small, about around 60 people, but I love it very much. That's the good thing about a small church. You get to know everybody. And you get to know them know than just a-face-you-see-every-Sunday.

Well, I've seen some OOTD's (outfit of the day) around other blogs and decided to try it. I'm not a big fan of taking pictures of myself or having others do it - because I only have brothers or my parents to do it and, believe me, that gets awkward - so I just took a picture of the clothes. I'm also not a huge fashion enthusiast, well maybe, but I like dressing up every once in a while so I hope you enjoy this:)


shirt - Sear's 
skirt - Target
knit cardigan - garage sale
watch - birthday present

The best thing about this whole outfit is the fact that none of these items cost a lot. Basically, nothing in my closet costs too much of a pretty penny. I've had a couple but they were either totally worth it or very much regretted.
The pencil skirt is probably one of my favorite buys as I've been looking for one that's modest and at the same time pretty cute; it was only around $7!!
The price for the shirt was $7 as well. Pricey, but it's just too cute.
My mother bought the cardigan at a garage sale for about $.25 or $.75. This is exactly why I love garage sales :)
The watch I got from my brother on my birthday - like two years ago? It's very slender and chic and I wear it whenever I go out.

If you like this OOTD post, please let me know so I can do more:)


Day 5:
Something you would change about the world?

A million things and probably everything. But, honestly, I don't care. I just really really want the Lord to come faster and take us all home. I'm tired living in a world full of sin and grief.

That is that.

Friday, April 17, 2015


Hey guys! It's officially (in my world) SPRING! How fantastic is that? I am definitely ready for some warmer weather and thunderstorms and clean fresh air. Hope it stays this way for a looong time. 

I love how we have all these different fruit trees in our backyard. It makes spring time so special with all these different blossoms blooming at different times. We have apple trees, and pear trees, and cherry trees, and an apricot tree. Though I'm pretty sure I left something out. *cheesy grin*
Oh yeah, was it the banana tree? But it doesn't blossom. At least not yet. And probably not any time soon.

Our apricot blossoms..

Apple trees starting to bloom.

Apricot blossoms blooming.


Day 4:
How do you think you're life would change if you achieved your dream? 

Taking in consideration that my dream right now is to get my life in as much order as I can, I'd say my life would change pretty nicely. Imagine, schoolwork always on time, piano practices every day, and knowledge expanding. Basically an almost perfect life. And no, I do not wish for a perfect life. I wish for a fulfilling life. A fulfilling life for my Savior. 

Better go work on that, huh?

QOTD (question of the day): What is the best compliment you have ever received?

Thursday, April 16, 2015


My brother (I'll call him P so not to mix you all up with the other five I have) and I went on a forest adventure yesterday. The word adventure might be slightly exaggerating; it was mostly all about taking pictures in a forest environment. But the butterfly feeling of an adventure was still there in my stomach. 
P used to be a photographer by profession. Now, it's a hobby whenever there's time, I guess. But it's a total inspiration being there with him and hearing him describe how to look for something fascinating in a seemingly boring place. Photography is truly such a beautiful thing to ever happen. And anyone can use it and do it. The forest might seem nothing special; the same silvery brown bland hues everywhere with a few little green plants peeking out every now and then to give at least a slight pop of color. But here's where you and the camera come in.
You are the main and most important factor here. It's all about how you see your surrounding. And the camera helps you accomplish that. It's a tool you use to give more detail to what you see and how you see it and what you want to focus on. I honestly have no words right now as how to describe photography. Maybe one day, when I'll finally understand the world, I'll tell you how it's done.
Now, the adventurous side. The forest was pretty scary. I now can honestly say that I do understand how people get lost in forest. Like seriously 100% understand. The fact that everything, everything, is the same color, I think that alone is enough for you to go berserk! After a while, it seems as if all the trees are the same and everything is the same and how do you get out of here?!? Seriously.
The other creepy thing was that after a little way into the forest, we happened upon a mattress. An old, mossy, little mattress. How. Disturbing. Is. That?!?! Farther in, there were more old, rotten, dirty and mossy and completely decayed wooden and wired bed stuff. The whole scene was pretty intensely eerie. But pretty fun nonetheless.

me crawling through the forest
beautiful flowers
eerie ruins left in the forest


Day 3:
What do you think is your reason for being here?

This was and is a pretty difficult question to answer. From a worldly point of view, I'd maybe say something similar to being here for my family, accomplishing something in this world whether for humanity or myself, or maybe just surviving. But I clearly disagree with that. I truly think there's something more to me and everyone else being here. I decided to ask my father.
My father is a big role model for me, both in his actions and words. He is someone I greatly admire especially in his spiritual knowledge. When I came up to him with this question, I wasn't exactly sure how to put it in such a way that I could explain what exactly I was looking for in an answer. But I think I got what I came for.
God created us. He created us so He can love us and we can love Him in return. I asked, "Why? What's the point in that if people still reject Him?" Well, what's the point in having children, then? Why does a mother want a child so? To want to love and cherish and to be loved and cherished in return. It seems so complicated but so simple. And now, at least I, understand my reason for being here.

(I really need to learn how to write better, don't I?)

What do you think is your reason for being here?

Monday, April 13, 2015


A little episode of our lives came to a closure.
Today my brother and I had probably our last IHOP breakfast. Remembering it makes me so sad. We made friends with the waiters and almost never had to look into the menu. We always ordered extra extra extra whipped cream, and they always made sure we had extra extra extra whipped cream. They asked us little questions about our lives and we, in turn, asked about theirs. I wonder what they will think happened to us if we don't come anymore. For the possibilities are endless of what could have happened to us. Or will they forget about us?  
I genuinely hope they have the best in their lives.
"There's always a reason for meeting the people we met." 
Day 2:
Something illegal that you consider should be legal.
The right to own chickens and such on your property without having to ask the consent of your city. Like come' on. We had chickens once but were ordered by the city to remove them. Well, I think that was more because of a neighbor's complaint (the chickens didn't even make that much noise). But still our city won't let you own chickens unless you have so much land. I get upset just by remembering about all this. The chickens were the cutest things ever!

Wednesday, April 8, 2015

365 Day Blog Challenge // Day 1

Hey guys!
Good news! Not sure if it's better for you or me, but, hear me out. I have decided to do a 365 day blog challenge. Which is basically a list of questions you answer and post on the blog for every day of the year. Or, at least, for 365 days. Ta-DA! Isn't this pretty cool?! I know, I know. I am actually pretty thrilled to do this. I'm pretty positive that I won't be posting exactly every day but this is still something, right? Right. So, starting today, this experiment-slash-adventure thing is starting!!
Day 1: 
Hopes, dreams, and plans for the next 365 days (with a picture of yourself)?

Ugh. This is hard.

I have a lot of hopes for the next 365 days. Some are very important; others it seems not so much. But then I guess they all are since they're my hopes. Well, first of all, I hope to do very well on a placement test for college as well as the ACT (which I might be doing this June. eep!) Also, I hope to improve myself on the piano. Overall, I hope to improve myself, as an individual, to be more confident and happy and outgoing with new people. I want to work on my personality.

My dreams are actually quite similar to my hopes. It's like my hopes and sleep got married and had dreams as children. :) Anyway, my dreams include playing the piano more at church, be a really great photographer, and.... yeah. There's a lot more, I promise. It's just that I can't really think of more at this moment.

Some plans for the next 365 days include the following: become thinner and tone my body, get into college, do a lot of fun stuff with the kids (nephews and nieces) for summer, enjoy every day to the fullest, start running.

This is pretty much all I can think of at the moment.

Pretty lame, huh? But I promise you this, I'm working on it. Lameness, that is.